Blind
by HR always live on
Summary: Harry is injured on an operation, leaving them both devastated. How will they learn to cope with their new reality? Set between series 8 and 9, HR. Now complete.
1. Chapter 1

Ruth felt her heart race as she listened to the operation she was currently observing. Harry was out in the field which made her more worried than usual. There had been two gunshots and nothing but static over the radio. "Alpha one can you hear me?"

Nothing but static and Ruth felt fear deep in her stomach. Suddenly the static cleared and she could hear Dimitri over the line.

"Get an ambulance down here Ruth."

She nodded at Tariq, who did that. "Are you both all right?"

"Yeah," Dimitri said. "Harry's injured but he should be fine."

"How injured?" Ruth asked before she could stop herself.

"I'm fine," Harry said, voice low and cracked.

"Good," Ruth said, the relief colouring her voice before she could stop it. "And Vorena?" she asked, the Italian drug and arms smuggler they'd been tailing.

"Dead," Harry said. "I'm fine. Just a bit bruised."

"Okay." Ruth took her headset off and closed her eyes.

"He's okay," Jo said, a hand on Ruth's shoulder as she could guess the turmoil she was going through. "Don't worry."

"I'm fine," she lied, shrugging Jo's reassuring hand off of her shoulder. She left the grid, grabbing her bag to go to the hospital. They'd said Harry was injured, so she wanted to be there for him. It didn't matter what people said, she had to be there.

* * *

"Miss Evershed, before you go in to see Mr Pearce, I have to warn you about his injury," the doctor said, impossibly young with a clipboard chart in front of him, barring the way to his room.

"He's going to be all right?" Ruth asked concerned. She'd been in the waiting room for nearly two hours before this man had come and found her to bring her to Harry.

"Oh yes, health wise he will be absolutely fine." Ruth sighed with relief. "But, he had some chemical of some description thrown in his face. It hasn't done any external damage at all, but I'm afraid he's lost his sight."

"What?" Ruth asked quietly. That made absolutely no sense to her. She couldn't comprehend it.

"He's blind." The words dropped from the doctors mouth as if in a different language. She simply could not understand it.

"It will pass though," she said desperately. "Won't it?"

"It seems permanent," the doctor said. "It's an untested and untried chemical agent so we don't know the long term effects. But there was no response from his eyes to all our tests. No response to light or stimulation. I'm sorry. It looks to be... permanent."

"Oh my God," she said quietly. "Does he know?"

"Yes," the doctor said. "He's… understandably upset."

"Does he want to see me?" Ruth asked, stuttering slightly. "I mean… has he asked for me?"

"Yes," the doctor said. "I wouldn't have been able to confide any patient information otherwise." The doctor looked embarrassed. "I will leave you with him."

"Thank you," Ruth said. When alone she looked at the door, willing herself to open it. She didn't know how Harry would cope with this. Something as simple as not being able to see? No doubt he would be angry. Incredibly angry. So much so that she almost feared going into his hospital room. But that would be cowardly and far less than he deserved. So she opened the door.

"Who's there?" he asked sharply

"It's me," she said quietly. "Ruth."

"Oh," he said, his voice quiet and almost broken as he relaxed back against the pillows. She looked at him for a moment. His eyes were open but unfocused. There was no emotion behind them. His face was completely blank and she knew that he'd locked his feelings up tightly.

"If you don't want me here I can leave," she said, walking further into the room anyway.

"No," he said. "Please. Don't leave."

"Okay," she said, her voice very soft as she sat next to him. "Then I won't." His hand rested on the bed sheets and very gently, she wrapped her fingers around his palm. He grasped hold of her as if she were a lifeline. His touch was warm, his grip tight on her palm. For minutes, neither of them spoke, his fingers tracing the back of her hand lightly. She watched as his touch became softer. Without meaning to, she leaned closer and kissed his cheek. His free hand touched his face where she'd kissed him and he shook his head.

"You can't do that any more Ruth," he said.

"Why not?"

"Because its not fair to you," he said. "We can't… carry on what we've started." She looked at his face and saw what this was costing him to say. He still had hold of her hand though.

"Harry, I know this is impossible for you," she said slowly. "I know that. But pushing me away isn't going to help."

"Ruth, I can't bear your pity," he said. "I'd rather be alone than have you… feeling sorry for me all the time. And I know you, you're not going to walk away from a blind man."

"No, you're right," she said. "I'm not. And by the way, its not pity I feel."

"Ruth…"

"I mean it," she said, squeezing his hand. "You can't just tell me to go away."

Harry swallowed away the lump in his throat. "Can I… touch your face?" he asked, his voice small. Ruth nodded, before remembering that would have no effect at all. So she took his hand and put it on her cheek. Very gently his thumb traced the contours of her face, following her eyebrow, softly going over her eyelashes before following the curve of her cheek. He moved across and did it on the other side of her face and Ruth was struck by how gentle he was being.

"Thank you," he said, dropping his hand back to the bed. Ruth covered it with her own. Neither of them spoke, neither of them knew what to say in this untenable situation.

* * *

**How mean am I? But Ruth will obviously have the opportunity to look after him.**


	2. Chapter 2

"Have you been discharged?" Ruth said some time later when she couldn't stay silent any longer.

"No." Harry suddenly looked uncomfortable. "I told them I wanted to stay overnight."

"Feeling sorry for yourself?" Ruth asked, her voice measured.

"Something like that," he agreed reluctantly.

"Do you need to be in hospital?" she asked quietly, her eyes lingering on the fact that he was still in his usual grid attire.

"Not particularly," he said shrugging.

"Then I'm going to take you home." She spoke firmly but gently.

"Ruth…"

"What?"

"Don't do this because you have to," he said. "I don't want you to feel obligated."

"I do not feel obligated to you," she said, finally letting go of his hand. "But I am going to help you. Because I want to. And your stubbornness won't stop me."

"Okay," he said quietly. "Come back." She hated the pleading note in his voice, and she guessed he hated it too. She sighed slightly before leaning over him and kissing his lips briefly. He reacted almost instantly.

"I'm not going anywhere," she said, her voice soft. "But I have to get your discharge papers."

"Okay," he said. Harry stilled and closed his eyes as Ruth left. He felt so desolate and lonely. How could he not be able to see? Something so fundamental. Something everyone took for granted. And because he'd been serving his country he now couldn't see. Harry sighed. Now he'd need a carer, and Ruth being a good woman wouldn't leave him because of this. She'd be stuck with him. He could feel the tears welling but he refused to cry. He didn't know who was watching.

* * *

"Sign there," Ruth said gently. She guided his hand to the line in question and she saw a muscle twitching in his jaw. "Harry," she said warningly. He signed, quite respectably and then the doctor took the clipboard.

"Right Mr Pearce. I'd like to see you again in a week to check."

"I'm blind. Is there any point prolonging it?" he asked sharply.

"All the same," the doctor replied calmly. "I'll see you in a week." Harry almost grunted in reply. Ruth gripped his arm tightly. The doctor and nurse left the room.

"We're alone," she said. "You can shout and be a moody git."

"I don't want to shout," he said. "I just want to see."

"I'm taking you home," she said firmly. "Do you have any whisky?"

"Er, yes," he said, thrown off track for a moment. "You want a drink?"

"No," she said. "But I have a feeling you will want one when you get home."

He actually smiled at that. "Yes, you're right," he said. "Come on."

* * *

"Two steps," she said quietly, heading up to the front door. "Give me your keys." He did and Ruth felt an explosion coming. He hadn't said a word on the drive home from the hospital and she could tell he was going to start shouting. She was bracing herself to not react to anything Harry might shout at her, because she knew he wouldn't mean it. Ruth led him to the sofa and he sat down. She saw a decanter of whisky and poured him a generous measure. "There you go," she said quietly as he wrapped his hands around the glass.

"Thank you."

"Do you want something to eat?" she asked as he took a gulp of whisky.

"No."

"Do you want to talk?"

"No."

"Do you want to shout at me and smash your house to pieces because of how unfair life is?"

"Yes," he said, an echo of a smile on his face. "But I don't want to upset you and have you storm out either. I know this isn't your fault, I just feel so angry."

"I think a little anger is acceptable," Ruth said, sitting down next to him. "Shout. Scream. Or let it go."

"I'm not ready to let it go. Come on Ruth it only happened a few hours ago."

"I know," she said. "I'm waiting for you to explode."

"I can't shout at you," he said after a long pause. "I can't drive away the one person I've got."

She smiled at him. She leaned her head against his shoulder and he wrapped his arm around her, almost out of habit. They hadn't been together for very long. Only a handful of dates, but there was no one in the world he would rather be with. Her touch against him made his anger almost completely fade away. She felt good against him. He leaned away from her to put his whisky glass on the table. He'd done this often enough that his hand found the table easily. Then he gathered Ruth to him firmly, his hand on her waist. Ruth smiled into his shoulder. This was very comfortable. For about five minutes until Harry started becoming stiff.

"Tell me what's wrong," she said firmly.

He sighed. "I want to see you," he said quietly. "As I can't manage that, I wanted to touch you. But then I thought that might be overstepping."

"You can touch me if you like," she said, and he could hear the smile in her voice.

"I didn't mean it quite like that," Harry said smiling.

"Mm," Ruth said. "A girl can dream." He chuckled and then shifted slightly, so he could smell her hair. His hand drifted over her hair and then gently over her face. His thumb traced her lips and she opened her mouth, kissing his skin. Harry smiled at her, but his gaze was heartbreakingly absent. He wasn't looking directly at her, a couple of inches to the left. _No, don't think that_, she said to herself. She found a distraction in the fact that Harry's palm carried on moving. Down her neck, hovering on her pulse for a moment. Her pulse which was thundering, and she hoped he didn't notice, although he probably did. But he said nothing as his palm moved over her shoulder and then down her arm, pausing at her wrist before he took her hand tightly in his.

"Thank you," he said, voice slightly husky. The moment was broken by Harry's stomach growling.

"I'm making you something for dinner," Ruth said. "No matter what you think, a diet of whisky isn't good for you."

"Fine," he said. "Can you put the news on or something?"

"Of course," she said, doing what he'd asked quietly before going through to the kitchen.

* * *

**Thank you for the reviews so far. Hope this chapter lives up to expectations :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**I have a busy weekend so I'll update when I can, but it might not be for a few days. In the meantime, enjoy.**

* * *

"Harry do you want me to stay here tonight?"

"Not particularly," he said. His formerly grumpy mood had come back after he'd eaten.

"I don't feel right leaving you," she said. "What if you need help?"

"Ruth, just go away!"

"Fine," she said, keeping her voice calm and level. She got up and squeezed his hand before she got her coat, bag and car keys. She returned to the living room a minute or two later. "Just in case you've never counted, you have thirteen steps on your stairs. I don't want you to trip. I'm just a phone call away if you need anything at all, do you remember the number?"

"Yeah," he said quietly. "That phone number I do remember."

"Do you need anything before I go?"

"Yes," he said. "I need you to forgive me for being a moody idiot. And if the offer is still good, I'd… quite like you to stay."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes," he said. He sighed heavily. "I hate being seen as weak by anyone," he said slowly. "Especially you."

"I don't see you that way," she said. "This is just… a problem you'll have to learn to deal with. It's harsh and unfair, but there's nothing you can do about it." She reached for him, her hands cradling his face gently. "Stop trying to push me away. It won't work and it will only irritate me."

"It's hard," he admitted. "I don't like being… reliant on someone."

"I hate to state the obvious, but you might not have a choice now," she said. Reluctantly she dropped her hands from his face but was surprised when he grasped her wrists tightly.

"Can you help me upstairs?"

"Mm," she agreed. "Come on." Very slowly she helped him up the stairs and Ruth could tell he hated this.

"I'll sleep in the guest room," she said as Harry sat down on the bed.

"Thank you Ruth," he said.

"I'll see you in the morning."

"Wait," he said. She watched him as he stood and then tried to find her. His hand rested on her shoulder and then he kissed her. Deeply. Ruth closed her eyes as his tongue delved into her mouth, leaving her breathless. It was passionate and she felt as if she were melting into him.

"Oh God, you know how to kiss," she said, a lazy smile on her face. He smiled back at her.

"Goodnight," he said.

"You can come and get me if you need anything," she said. "I won't mind."  
"Thank you Ruth." She left him to it, closing the door behind her. Harry felt grateful for her presence and her help, but he also was relieved to have some time on his own, where he could think. He clumsily undressed himself and got into bed. As it happened he couldn't give himself and Ruth any thought at all. He was so tired he fell asleep instantly.

* * *

Harry awoke with a start. He rolled over to look at the time but his digital clock was black. Then he remembered. He couldn't see the clock. It was there but he had no idea what the time was. He could have slept for ten minutes or ten hours. With a sigh he got up and felt his way out of his bedroom. He kept his hand on the wall as he turned down the hall to the guest room where Ruth was sleeping. His fingers hit the wood grain of the door and he knocked twice.

"Come in," she said, her voice groggy and filled with sleep. He opened the door, feeling guilty for waking her.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I woke up and I wasn't sure if it was morning or not. Clearly you were sleeping."

"Hang on," she said, switching the light on and looking at her watch. "It's four in the morning."

Harry sighed. "I didn't mean to disturb you."

"Its fine," she said getting up and walking towards him. "This is not your fault." She looked right in his face and saw the sadness there.

"Mm," he whispered before he could stop himself. He could sense that she was right in front of him. He could smell her and he loved her scent. She smelt of sleep, a fragment of her perfume from the previous day and something else.

"What are you wearing?" Ruth raised her eyebrows at him. "Sorry," he said, not being in the slightest.

"Do you want to know?"

"I want to picture it," he admitted.

"I hope you don't mind, but I found one of your shirts," she said. "After all, I hadn't brought a change of clothes to work, not planning… on this."

"So… you're wearing my shirt?"

"I am," she said, a smile in her voice. He put his hand on her shoulder, feeling the thin material and her body heat through it. He let his fingers trail over her arm, and then she lifted her arm so his palm slipped to her ribs. He froze but when she didn't move he let his fingers splay on her body. Very slowly he moved downwards, following the contours of her body. Down to her waist, across the flare of her hip until his fingers reached the hem of the shirt, pausing on her bare thigh. The fact that he was touching her naked leg did not escape him and he needed a reality check.

"Enjoying yourself?"

"Yes," he admitted. He dropped his hand and she let out the breath she'd been holding. His slow and gentle touch and exploration had been almost erotic. "I'll leave you to sleep." She kissed him briefly and he smiled at her.

"Goodnight," she said, her heart racing as Harry left, a hand to the wall as he went back to his bedroom. God she could get used to Harry touching her like that. She slipped back to sleep, happier than she thought possible.

* * *

When Harry next awoke, he assumed it was daylight. He guessed he'd slept for another couple of hours and when he knocked on Ruth's door there was no answer. He dressed slowly before going downstairs, following the noise in the kitchen.

"Morning," Ruth's voice said.

"Hi," he said. "What are you doing? I can hear a tapping."

"I'm taking the front glass cover off of a clock I found in your spare room," she said. "So you can feel the hands and know the time for yourself. And I've put fresh batteries in the back too."

"So I don't disturb you in the middle of the night?"

"Oh you can," she said easily. "I rather enjoyed the disruption." He smiled at the casual tone she used. "Do you want me to make you a tea?"

"No thank you," he said stiffly, proceeding to do it himself. She knew he didn't want help so she wasn't going to push herself on him. While she was unscrewing the clock she watched Harry out of the corner of his eye. Scalding himself was unlikely to improve his mood. He was careful and slow, but he managed it on his own, much to Ruth's relief. He sat down opposite her and took a sip of his tea. She could tell he was pleased that he'd managed it on his own, even if he'd never tell her that.

"So what time is it?" Ruth didn't answer. She gave him the clock, now without its cover. Harry delicately felt the hands. "Ten past eight?"

"Yes," she said, smiling.

"Why aren't you at work?"

"It's Saturday."

"I forgot," he said quietly. They lapsed into silence, each with their own thoughts.


	4. Chapter 4

"Say it," Harry said when their mugs were empty. Ruth had been quiet and he could almost visualise her running her finger around the rim of her cup, her eyes in the vague distance as she thought to herself. Loudly.

"I was wondering how long I'm staying here," Ruth said.

"Oh. You want to go home," he said, his heart low. "Of course you do."

"No," she said. "I really don't want to go home. But at some point I'm going to need some more clothes. So I am going to have to pack some things. That is… if you want me here."

"I do," he said. He sighed heavily. "If its not putting you out."

"What else would I be doing?" Ruth said. "Sitting in front of my TV, eating on my own? No, I think I'd rather be here until you're sick of me."

"Okay," Harry said, grinning. "I won't do anything stupid while you're gone."

"Mm," she said disbelievingly. "I'm going to go then." She moved the chair back and leaned over Harry, kissing him. She had intended it to be quick, but that went out of the window when Harry tangled his fingers in her hair, pulling her tight against him. She moaned into his mouth as he kissed her expertly. His tongue flicked against her lips and she pulled him close, her hands behind his neck. She ended up sitting on his lap, as close to him as possible.

When the kiss ended she leaned her forehead against his, her eyes closed as she tried to keep her breathing level. "You liked that," he said, a hint of a question in his voice.

"I did," she agreed. "I'll be back in an hour or so."

"Good," he said. He kissed her again, briefly this time. She got up and put her coat on before leaving. When the door closed Harry closed his eyes and licked his lips, still tasting Ruth on him. That kiss was delicious. He went upstairs to have a shower. He managed it, slowly, relieved that he usually lived with order. So he knew where his shampoo was, and didn't try to wash himself with toothpaste or something similarly stupid.

After his shower, he made himself some toast (which ended up being more like warm bread) with nothing on it, as he couldn't work out which jar was the marmalade, He had just finished his breakfast when Ruth came back. He heard her dropping her bag in the hall as she came back in the kitchen. "Hi."

"Hi," he said. "I want to ask you for a favour."

"Of course," she said. "What is it?"

"I want to shave, but I think handling a razor when I can't see it, is probably a recipe for bloodshed."

"Oh," she said. "Of course I'll help."

"Thank you," he said. He got up and Ruth followed him upstairs in silence. He didn't like asking, that much she was sure of.

Then she put her foot in it. She'd lathered shaving cream over his face and then she couldn't help it. She giggled.

"Ruth, please don't laugh at me," he said, far beyond hurt.

"No, I'm not laughing at you," she said quickly. "I promise."

"Ruth…" He shrugged away from her, his face directed at the floor.

"No, I wasn't," she said. "I was thinking about doing this." She tilted his face upwards and kissed him, smearing shaving cream over her lips and she laughed happily. He could hear that there was no malice in it, and he reached for her face, feeling the cream smeared all over her lips. He laughed back and suddenly the bathroom was filled with their laughter. Ruth felt so happy that at the moment she simply didn't care that Harry was blind.

* * *

They were both sitting in the lounge, Ruth reading and Harry flicking through the television channels, trying to find something decent to listen to. "Is it too early for a whisky?"

"You know it is," Ruth said. "But I'm not your mother, you want a whisky I'm not going to stop you."

Harry shrugged uncomfortably. "God, I feel helpless."

"I know," she said.

"I want to be normal, I want to be able to go to work, to take you out to dinner. God, I hate this."

"I take it the phone call with Towers didn't go well," Ruth said, talking about a call she hadn't been able to overhear, locked in his office.

"His pity was so thick I could have carpeted the house with it," he said bitterly. "My pension is intact and I will be getting a good dose of compensation for my disability. Retiring immediately."

"How much?" Ruth asked. Harry raised his eyebrows at her. "Well," she said flustered. "I mean, obviously its not going to make up for you losing your sight but its better than a kick in the teeth isn't it? And if it pays for a nice holiday for us so much the better."

"Holiday for us?"

"Well, if you want to take me with you I mean."

"Oh yes, great idea. Lets go to the top of the Eiffel Tower. Lets admire the view over Paris," he said sarcastically. "Or go and see the Acropolis. Or climb to the top of St Peters in Rome to see over the city. They'd be brilliant things to do if I had eyes that worked!" He felt frustration coursing through him and chucked the remote at the TV.

"Ah!"

"Ruth?"

"Yeah, that just bounced off the TV and hit me," she said, her voice strained.

"God I'm sorry," he said guilt filling him as he stood up. "I didn't mean to."

"No, I know," she said. "Don't worry." She reached for him and held his face.

"I'm so fucking useless," he said, tears filling his eyes.

"It's okay," she said, holding him against her. Her hip was smarting where the plastic had hit bone, but right now she didn't care. She held him tight against her as he cried, her hand rubbing up and down his back.

* * *

Harry stopped crying eventually and drew back from Ruth, embarrassed at his out pouring of emotion, especially in front of her. "I never meant to hurt you."

"I know that," she said. The pain in her hip had all but faded, much worse was the pain of seeing him like this.

"You need to go," he said, his face locked away. "I will not risk hurting you again. By what I say or what I do."

"I don't like being hurt either," she said, her hand on his face. "But I am not leaving here because you feel guilty for accidentally hitting me with the remote control. It doesn't matter."

"Ruth…"

"No," she said firmly. "Stop it."

"But Ruth…"

"No. No "but Ruth" anything."

"You're stubborn."

"Pot calling the kettle black," she said. Harry smiled slightly at that and the tension lessened somewhat. "I'll make some dinner. It'll have to be omelettes you have nothing in your fridge."

"Fine," he agreed reluctantly. Ruth picked up the remote and switched the TV onto a classical music channel. She then gave him the remote, but he gripped her wrist firmly. "I'm sorry."

"I'm hungry," she said calmly. "I'll be back with food in a minute."

"Thanks," he said, his heart hollow.

* * *

**Well, it couldn't be all happiness could it? Thank you for the reviews so far. :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**This is a short chapter. More when its written, thank you for the reviews so far.**

* * *

"Ruth, can I ask you something?" he said later that night.

"Mm?"

"Would you… mind being with me tonight? I mean not for anything to happen, I'd just like someone to be there. When I say someone, I mean you obviously, I just…" he sighed with exasperation.

"That would be good," she said, trying to help him out of his mess. "I'd like that." She kissed him and he smiled into the embrace. His hands settled on the small of her back, pulling her flush against him as the kiss ended.

"Thank you," he said.

"I'm not finished yet," she said, sinking into another kiss. This went on for a good long while until Harry pushed her down into the sofa, still lip locked. He moved his mouth, kissing and licking her neck. Her pulse was thundering and her breathing became heavy. "Oh Harry," she breathed.

He chuckled against her flesh, his hands sliding under her blouse at the waist.

"You feel so good," he whispered.

"Hang on a minute," she said quickly. She pulled her blouse off quickly, threw it to the floor. Then she put Harry's hands back on her waist. "Carry on," she said happily. Harry smiled at her, his fingers gently stroking her bare skin.

"We should stop," he said, keeping his hands on her skin anyway. "You don't want this."

"Stop making my mind up for me," she said.

"Do you really want to be half dressed on the sofa while a blind man kisses you?"

"No," she said. "I want to be in your bed while _you_ kiss me. The fact that you're blind makes no difference."

"Ruth…"

"But, I can wait," she said. "Until you're comfortable. Shall we go up to bed?"  
He sighed heavily. "Yes, lets." She gripped his hand and led him up the stairs. When they got to the bedroom he sat on the bed, staring into space. Ruth was about to go into the bathroom to get undressed, when she though, what's the point? She quickly undressed and Harry could hear the rustling of fabric.

"What are you doing?"

"Getting ready for bed," she said.

Harry groaned. "You're undressing in front of me?"

"Sorry," she said shrugging into his shirt, slightly embarrassed. "Should I not have?"

"No," he said. "It's fine. I'm just busy cursing God for my lack of sight at this precise moment in time. That's all."

She smiled and watched as Harry slowly undressed. Out of habit he took his shirt off and for the first time she was confronted with his naked chest. "What?" he asked

"Mm?" She hadn't realised that as she'd been looking at him she'd sighed with contentment. "Sorry, I was just… admiring the view," she admitted.

"What view?"

"Your chest," she said plainly. "I was just… it doesn't matter."

"Admiring?" Harry questioned.

"Yes," she said, slipping under the duvet. "In case its never occurred to you Harry, I find you very attractive." He looked like he found this completely unbelievable, but he said nothing as he got into bed on the other side. Without thinking too much about it she rested her hand on the scar left by Tom Quinn's bullet. He jerked away from her and she dropped her fingers. "Sorry."

"No," he said. "I just didn't expect you to touch that. No one ever has."

"Oh. Sorry, I should have asked." He groped for her hand and clasped her fingers tightly. Then he placed her palm back on his shoulder.

"It feels nice," he said. She shuffled closer to him and he put his arm around her. Somehow this was easier for him in the darkness under the duvet, where he knew Ruth couldn't see him either. He tightened his grip and felt her breasts push against his chest. She felt so soft. He mm'd under his breath and she smiled.

"I could get used to you shirtless," she said, her voice a whisper.

"For the record, I find you very attractive too," he said. He felt her smile against his shoulder. Then he almost groaned with desire as her legs tangled with his, pulling him as close as she could. In this position it didn't take long for her to feel his erection against her hip. Harry's body went rigid as he felt arousal coursing through him and knew Ruth could feel it too.

"No, don't be embarrassed," she whispered. "And don't let me go unless you actually want to." He kissed the top of her head in answer to that and she smiled. With her head pressed against his chest she kissed his skin. Then she started to run her tongue delicately over his flesh, making him moan.

"Ruth, you have to stop that," he said, pulling back.

"Why?"

"Because I don't want to." He could sense her awkward silence. "No, I mean I do. Of course I want you, but just not tonight."

"Okay," she said. "Lie back." He did and she leaned over him, her breasts pushing against him. "I want you Harry," she whispered. "I don't mind waiting." Her voice changed suddenly, taking on a seductive tone which had Harry's heart racing. "But I just thought you should know, that whenever you want me, you can have me." She kissed his cheek before laying down next to him, a smile on her face. Harry managed to shut his mouth from shock and rested a hand on Ruth's fingers.

"Goodnight," he whispered.


	6. Chapter 6

Ruth awoke first and felt surprised when she saw how Harry lay. He was holding her as easily and intimately as a lover, and she knew that he'd moved in his sleep. He wouldn't be touching her like this if he'd been awake. Either because he felt nervous, or because he would have felt it would be taking liberties to touch her while she was sleeping. They were side by side, facing each other, even though he was asleep. His thigh was between her legs, tight against her. His hands rested against her body, one on her hip the other cradling her breast firmly. This was very intimate, and Ruth could feel her blood pressure rising and her body reacting. She could feel her nipple hardening against his palm. His face lay less than five inches from hers, she could feel his breath across her face. He looked younger in sleep, his face usually lined with worry at work looked so much more relaxed. She wished she could make him look like that permanently.

But with his sudden blindness, that was unlikely to happen she thought sadly.  
It really didn't bother her, but she knew it did him. He wouldn't have wanted to leave MI5, especially like that. It was just one more thing that would make him feel small and incompetent. As well as the rather important thing that he couldn't see throughout day to day life she thought to herself. But she did have no doubt that he would learn to adapt, with time.

"Mm…" Harry murmured, beginning to wake up. She stayed perfectly still, or at least that was the intention. When he pushed his leg between hers hard and squeezed her breast firmly she couldn't help but moan. With that his eyes popped open. Then a grimace filled his face as he remembered his blindness, but he didn't move. "Ruth?"

"Yes," she said. "You haven't woken up next to a stranger."

"Good," he said. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't be touching you like this."

"No please don't," she said as he tried to draw back from her. "I like you touching me like this. It feels… oh…" she finished with a long moan. He actually laughed at that, before dipping his head to kiss her good morning. She licked his lips deliciously as he pulled her as close as possible. She could feel the warmth of his chest through her blouse and she had the longing desire to get rid of all the clothes that were still in the way. Even though it was really only three items it felt like more. She felt a thrill of desire as Harry's hands pushed the crumpled shirt she wore up a few inches, his hands feathering across her stomach. She pulled her lips away from him and gasped for breath, dragging air into her lungs.

"Are you all right?" he asked, more than a hint of amusement in his voice.

"God Harry, you know what you do to me," she said. Her hands rested on his wrists and she pulled his hands upwards, under the shirt. He let her guide his hands in silence, his breathing getting heavier as his hands found the swell of her full breasts. He squeezed gently before drawing back suddenly. Ruth sighed with exasperation, thinking he'd reached his limit when she was surprised at Harry tugging the shirt impatiently.

"Can you help me with your buttons Ruth?" he all but growled. She smiled eagerly and quickly got rid of the offending item, chucking it to the floor. Then she put Harry's hands back on her waist. He stroked her bare skin and pressed his lips to her neck, slowly working his way across the sensitive skin. He paused by her pulse point, feeling her blood thundering through her.

"You seem much more eager than last night," she said.

"Well, last night I was suffering from… well… I was feeling sorry for myself to be honest with you. In the clear light of day, I can see the advantages of having you topless in my bed." She smiled at his enthusiasm, pleased that the problems of the day before seemed to have burnt out. "Plus I seem to remember you saying I could… what was it? "Have you whenever I wanted." Was that what you said?"

"I did," said, her voice filled with humour and happiness. "I didn't expect you to wake up and take me up on the offer. Thrilled that I am that… oh…" He had squeezed her nipples tightly, making her cry out.

"Lie on your back," he demanded. She rolled over, smiling. Harry reached for her face, his thumb caressing the contours of her face.

"What are you doing?"

"I wanted to see if you were smiling," he said. "If you were happy."

"I'm smiling Harry," she said, twisting her head so she could take his thumb into her mouth. She bit the pad of his thumb gently and he pulled his hand back.

"Keep you teeth to yourself," he said easily, before kissing her again. He pressed his body against hers and Ruth held him close. She moved her hands down his back slowly, and then she grasped his bum, fingernails digging in. He groaned, the fabric of their underwear the only barrier between their bodies.  
He moved down her body and cradled her breasts gently. "God, I wish I could see these," he said, not with bitterness, more with longing.

"Well, you'll just have to touch more often to remember then won't you?" she said. Harry's mouth dropped open for a moment before he caught hold of himself again.

"Maybe I will," he said, squeezing.

"I have a couple of freckles," Ruth said, her voice low. She took his hand and trailed his index finger over her left breast. "There… and there." He bent and kissed the freckles, being remarkably accurate. Then he took her nipple into his mouth and sucked. "Mm…" she murmured. He didn't stop, his mouth warm and wet on her flesh. "Harry, that feels so good."

He sat up for a moment. "Do you want this? I don't need your pity, or sympathy or anything else…But I have to know"

"Oh I do want this," she said quickly. "I can honestly say that I have never been to bed with a man unless I wanted to. That isn't going to change."

"Promise me you'll tell me if you don't like anything," he said. "Usually I can read… things on your face. But…"

"Okay," she said, knowing he needed this promise from her. "Right now, I'm… I need you to touch me." He grinned, before doing as she asked. His touch was so gentle and light that she shivered. He touched her almost reverently, fingertips grazing her chest, her breasts, her nipples making goosebumps cover her body. Then his hands went to her ribcage, following the lines of her bones, just able to feel them through her skin. He slowly drew his hand across her stomach and Ruth felt the first twinge of unease as she didn't have a flat stomach. And (from looking at Harry's file) she knew that the women he'd been with before had been very glamorous where she wasn't.

"What's wrong?" he asked, feeling her body stiffen before she could say a word.  
"I'm not… I don't have a flat stomach. And my thighs are a bit… large."

"Ruth, you are beautiful," he said. He leaned in and kissed her belly button, dipping his tongue inside. "Granted I can't see, but my tongue and my hands seem to agree with me."

"As well as other parts of your anatomy," she said with a laugh, bringing her toes up to nudge the part in question through his boxers. He smiled back before kissing her again as her fingers laced in his hair. Very quickly he hooked his fingers under her knickers and pulled them from her. His fingers traced her hip bones and he paused, feeling an inch or so of thickened skin. "Is this a scar?" he asked, thumb hovering on it.

"Oh, yes," she said distractedly. "Bike ride when I was younger. Fell off."

"Oh," he said simply. He kissed her hip, nipping her scar lightly with his teeth.  
He could smell her arousal and was thrilled to know she wanted him. He ran his fingers over her delicate folds and she gasped. She was so wet. He dipped his head and licked her, pleased when she started mewling, and already knowing Ruth wasn't the kind of woman to moan just to boost his ego. Previous experience told him that he was good at this, and it seemed in the last nine years of celibacy he hadn't lost the knack. Placing his hands on her hips he stilled her wriggling movements before he carried on licking her.

"Oh Harry!" she cried, feeling herself close to orgasm, before he'd even got going. His tongue on her felt exquisite. The stubble on his cheeks was scratching her inner thighs too, just the right side of pleasure and pain divide. It felt delicious. She put her hands on his fingers on her hips, gripping on for dear life.

"Oh God I'm close," she breathed.

"That was quick," he murmured before sucking her clitoris, making her buck with delight, a small high pitched cry coming from her before she could stop it. He lay next to her and rested his fingers on her face, trying to feel her expression. All he could feel was the rush of air against his thumb as she fought for breath. Eventually her breathing calmed down, and she took his thumb into her mouth, sucking for a moment.

"I need to feel you inside me," she whispered, embarrassment gone in the afterglow of orgasm. She reached for him, pulling his boxers down, her hand wrapping around his erection. "Mm, you need it too, it would seem."

"Well I am only human," he said. He rolled on top of her, making her shriek happily. His erection rested on her thigh but instead of moving her body, he kissed her. His mouth first found her nose accidentally and she giggled. "I never thought I could make you giggle," he said.

"A little lower," she said. His eyes opened and she was struck by how beautiful they really were. Hazel eyes which she'd wanted to see focused on her for years. She remembered the force of his gaze which she had experienced so often on the grid. Such a shame that he couldn't see her, even though he was looking at her warmly, the emotion showing on his face.

Suddenly without warning he pushed into her slowly. Agonisingly slowly. There came a point where she thought there simply couldn't be more of him. But there was. There was no doubting Harry was well endowed. Her breathing came in short sharp gasps and he kissed her lips as he stilled within her. "All right?" he asked, his voice husky with emotion.

"God yes," she said. Suddenly remembering he couldn't see, she reached for his face, both of her hands gently feeling the contours of him. Her thumbs swooped over his eyebrows gently before he moved inside her and she gasped. He pulled out of her slowly, agonisingly slowly. "Harry…" she breathed. He left her completely, the tip of him teasing her folds slowly. "Oh please Harry…"

He smiled and then pushed back into her hard, making her cry out delightfully. She reached for him, kissing his face slowly, any part of him she could reach. He was dragging this out, she thought to herself. Making it deliciously slow and making her skin feel so electric and alive.

"Harder," she begged. He didn't need telling twice and thrust inside her powerfully. "Ah!" He held her tightly, his fingers tangled in her hair as he moved powerfully inside her, now never pausing for breath. Ruth could feel her muscles tightening with every thrust, approaching her second orgasm and she moaned, her breath coming in spurts. She arched her back up to meet him, writhing underneath him.

Suddenly he climaxed and groaned into her neck as he came inside her. She tilted her hips up and moaned as she reached climax herself a second or two after him, closing her eyes in ecstasy. She must have passed out for a moment or two because when she opened her eyes Harry was stroking her face, the duvet pulled over the pair of them.

"That was amazing," she breathed. Her body felt sensitive and tingling all over. She felt well and truly loved. He pulled her close against his shoulder and kissed her hair softly. "Did you enjoy it?" she asked as he hadn't said a word.

"Enjoy isn't the word," he said. "That felt… incredible." She smiled into his skin, so he could feel her happiness. She was about to ask something else, but she heard his gentle snores filling the room. So she kept quiet and closed her eyes, drifting off to sleep.

* * *

**Hope this is an okay chapter. It was hard to write, what with Harry's problem!**


	7. Chapter 7

Ruth awoke, feeling Harry's fingers feathering across her skin. Staying perfectly still she opened her eyes and saw that the duvet was around her knees. Harry's hand was gently going over her skin, from her shoulder and slowly down her body to her thigh and then back again. She loved the way he was touching her and willed her body not to react. She didn't want to give away the fact that she was awake, because he might stop. His hand cradled her breast for a moment, thumb stroking her freckles which he had accurately remembered.

"I know you're awake," he murmured, still touching her gently.

"What gave me away?"

"Your breathing changed," he said. He reached down and covered her with the duvet, which she was grateful for. As nice as his touch was, she had been getting a little chilled. Harry laughed as Ruth's stomach growled loudly.

"We need to go and get some breakfast," Ruth said with a smile. "Do you have anywhere near here who can do a decent fry up?"

"What? Go out?" he asked bewildered.

"Harry, you have nothing in your fridge," she said. "And even if you did, I don't fancy frying some bacon and sausages. I'd rather someone else did it for me. There's a café round the corner isn't there?"

"Well… yes," he started. "But…"

"Come on," she said. "You have to leave the house at some point, and you must be as hungry as I am. And it is just down the street. What's the problem?"

"I don't want people to see me and to… pity me."

"No one can tell you're blind by looking at you," Ruth assured him. "You just look like… Harry," she finished.

"Will you help me with the menu?" he asked quietly.

"Of course," she said, privately thinking that she'd bet her car on the fact he'd have a Full English breakfast, but she didn't say anything.

"Okay," he agreed reluctantly. "I guess I can't stay in my house for the rest of my life. But I'll pay."

"Perfect," she said, getting out of bed. She pulled her clothes out of her overnight bag and quickly dressed. Then she saw that Harry might need some help. All he'd managed was to get some clean boxers on. Ruth picked out a clean shirt for him and slipped it over his chest.

"Thank you," he said quietly. She buttoned it up, allowing her fingers to caress his chest between each button.

"You don't need a tie," she said quietly. "I like your shirt with a button or two undone."

"Pass me my jeans will you?" She did and Harry slipped into them, tightening the belt. Ruth bit her lip as he did that, yearning for him all over again. Harry fumbled for the second drawer down and got out a pair of socks. "Lets go."

* * *

Once out of the house Harry was surly and silent, even though Ruth held his hand down the street. This was both for comfort and to lead him down the road, which he didn't appreciate. Ruth didn't try to engage him in conversation, until they'd sat down in a little café around the corner. Ruth picked up the menu and was pleased to see that they did a fried breakfast. Ruth read out some of the options quietly and Harry nodded.

The waitress came over and Ruth ordered. She did not help Harry though, he needed to do it by himself. In hindsight, this had been a bad idea. Harry pointed his head in the waitresses direction, but unfortunately as he spoke, it looked like he was talking to her breasts. The waitress frowned with discomfort and glared at Harry, but took their order anyway, her irritation obvious.

"I'm just going to the ladies," Ruth said. She then explained to the waitress in private that Harry wasn't leering at her. The waitress seemed not to be offended once she had explained. When Ruth sat back down Harry smiled at her. She was relieved that he didn't pick up on her absence. After the initial awkwardness they actually enjoyed their breakfast together. Harry's hand kept lacing over hers, fingers entwining. It felt rather sensual for a public place, but Ruth felt happy.

* * *

"I feel much more human now I've had bacon," Ruth said, pushing her plate aside.

"Mm," Harry agreed. "Good mushrooms too." Harry managed to get some money out of his wallet without assistance, but couldn't work out which notes were which. Ruth helped him, putting down the correct money. Harry shrugged slightly as he got up. When they were out in the street he turned to her.

"What were you mumbling to the waitress?"

"What?"

"I heard your voice but couldn't catch your words," he said. "What were you telling her."

Ruth sighed for a moment, before deciding honesty was probably best. "I told her that you didn't mean any offence by looking at her breasts instead of her face."

"What?" Harry asked, his voice deathly quiet. "I was… really?"

"Yes, its fine," Ruth said patiently. "Once I told her that you couldn't help it she really didn't mind. It's not as if you can leer at her is it?"

"God I'm embarrassed," he said. "I thought I was looking at her face. I thought…"

"I know," she said. She pushed her body against his and kissed his cheek, not caring that they were in the middle of the street. "I know that the only boobs you're interested in are mine," she added, a hint of laughter in her voice.

"Very true, but not the point," he whispered into her ear. "I can't believe I did that."

"She wasn't offended," Ruth said. "Well, she was until I told her that you weren't a lecherous…"

"Perverted old man is what you're looking for I think," he said with a grumble.

"Well, don't worry," she said. They were silent until they reached Harry's door and he unlocked it. "Look, I am going to go shopping for you, your cupboards and fridge are completely empty."

"You don't have to," he said, uncomfortable to have her shopping for him.

"You bought me breakfast," she said simply. "And I'm not going to resort to eating those old biscuits in the cupboard. Let me go shopping for you."

"Fine," he agreed. He leaned close and kissed her goodbye. "Come back soon." Ruth smiled and closed the door behind her.

* * *

That night they got into bed together in silence. Ruth didn't bother with any clothes, feeling that it would simply get in the way if things took a passionate turn later. Harry may have had the same thought, coming to bed in only his boxers. She settled in bed and something caught her eye. Looking over his shoulder she saw a book resting on Harry's bedside table.

"Jane Eyre?" she asked in surprise.

"Oh, yes," he said. "I was reading it before… well, before."

"I wouldn't have taken you for a Bronte man," she said.

"I don't like Wuthering Heights, but I do like the others," he said. "Jane Eyre is my favourite." Ruth leaned over him and picked the book up, opening it at the bookmark. "Just, put it down," he said and she knew he was embarrassed. "Or burn it. It's useless now anyway."

"No matter how annoyed you are, I draw the line at burning books," she said firmly. "That is one thing I will never do."

"Sorry, I forgot you studied classics," he said.

"Would you… like me to read to you?"

"No," he said firmly. "I don't want you to lower yourself."

"Harry, I haven't read Jane Eyre in about fifteen years," she said. "I could do with refreshing my memory. And I don't mind." She waited in silence as Harry had an internal argument with himself. He didn't want to admit that he couldn't do something as simple as read a book. It was as if he'd become illiterate overnight, and he couldn't stand that. But on the other hand Ruth offering to read it to him had a certain charm. Hearing her voice reading to him had a definite attraction.

"Okay," he said. "That'd be good. Plus the end of Jane Eyre is rather appropriate isn't it? Mr Rochester's eyesight and all that."

"Mm, hadn't even thought of that," Ruth said. "Do you mind if I go back to the beginning of the chapter?"

"No," he said. She opened the book and began to read. After a few sentences Harry settled into the pillow, listening to the cadence of her voice. After a page or two she moved so her head was on his chest and he stroked her hair softly. It was so comfortable, and there was nowhere else in the world she'd rather be.

* * *

**Thank you for the reviews so far. (I've been the waitress in this chapter by the way!) This is all I had planned, but I will post more when its written.**


	8. Chapter 8

Ruth woke to rain lashing against the window, and Harry kissing her chest.

"Mm, morning," she said lazily.

"Hi," he replied for a moment, before using his mouth for more enjoyable things. He made love to her quickly and passionately, leaving her breathless and shaking.

"Well hello Monday morning," she said when she'd stopped gasping for breath.

"Mm," he said. "Well, wouldn't want you to forget me at work today."

"Oh, right," she said, her heart dropping. "Work."

"Don't you want to go?"

"No," she said. "I don't want to leave you, and I don't want to be on the grid without you either. Will you be okay?"

"Yeah," he said. "I've managed to spend many days in my own company," he said. He leaned over and kissed her. "Don't worry about me."

"I'm going to call though," she said. "I want to make sure you're okay."

"I'm not your child, I don't need checking on," he said grumpily.

"I know that," she said acidly. "But I like checking on you. If nothing else I'm sure you'll be miserable away from the action at Thames House anyway." Harry sighed, knowing she had a point. "And if sex always ends with you in such a good mood, I'll have to refrain from my base desires."

"You're right," he agreed. He rolled on top of her and kissed her lips slowly. "I'm sorry."

"Mm," she said, still being stiff in his arms.

"I mean it," he said. "Sorry." He kissed her again, making her melt into his arms.

"Right I need a shower," she said, getting out from under him. "Want to join me?"

"I would love to," he said. "But I'm not going to. Because you warm and wet in the shower would be a long thing, not the short shower I think you need to get to work on time."

"Fair point," she said. She stroked his chest before getting up. Harry lay still as he heard the shower running. He didn't like the thought of trying to manage on his own, but he knew he had to. He didn't want to start relying on Ruth for everything. He needed to manage on his own, without her help for every little thing. So he was going to manage by himself.

He must have drifted off to sleep for twenty minutes or so, because when he woke he heard Ruth putting her jacket on and slipping her shoes on. "I'll see you later," she said.

"Bye." He kissed her deeply and then, all of a sudden she was gone. Harry rolled over in bed and closed his useless eyes, trying to slip back into sleep.

* * *

Ruth switched her computer on and smiled as Jo came in and sat next to her.

"Hi, good weekend?"

"Yeah," Jo said easily. "How's Harry?"

"Miserable," Ruth said. "It's a very hard adjustment, obviously."

"Yeah," Jo said. "I can't even imagine. But surely it wasn't all bad?"

"What do you mean?" Ruth asked confused.

"You have the look of a woman who… well, who's been well fucked," Jo said, making Ruth blush.

"Is it that obvious?" she asked, glancing around, glad no one could overhear her.

"No," Jo said. "I was taking a shot in the dark." The younger woman grinned. "How was it?"

"I don't talk about my sex life," she said.

"Oh come on," Jo said. "I have no interest in him in that way. I was just curious."

"It was… great," Ruth said, a small smile on her face.

"I'm glad you're happy," Jo said. "What about his eyesight?"

"Completely black," Ruth said, the smile fading from her face. "It really hurts him. He doesn't like being anything other than self reliant. It's… hard."

"Well, I'm sorry," Jo said. "Have you done the debrief yet?"

"No," she said. "My weekend was rather busy." She allowed herself a smile at that before turning back to her computer.

* * *

Harry had his phone in his hand, waiting for Ruth to call. He knew she would over lunch, but all he was doing was waiting. A representative or the RNIB had arrived in the morning and Harry had been less than civil. In hindsight, grunting at the woman who'd come over to help wasn't helpful. She'd left a packet which Harry hadn't touched, simply leaving it where it was. He knew it was an introduction to Braille, but he didn't want to read it. Or even take it out of the envelope. Suddenly the phone rang.

"Hi," he said.

"How are you?" she asked quietly.

"Fine," he said.

"What's happened?" she asked, knowing from his tone something was wrong.

"I had a visit from a stupid RNIB woman advising me on how to cope with my loss of sight," Harry said.

"Ah. How are you with that?"

"I wanted the woman out of my house as soon as possible. Look, I'm fine," he said. "I'll get over it."

"Okay," she said. "Listen, I'm not going to work late. I should be home on time tonight. It's all paperwork from Friday. Nothing vital."

"Great," Harry said. "I want to see you. Well, not _see_ you obviously. Though I do want that, its just unlikely." He sighed. "I meant, I want you home."

"Good," she said with a smile. "I'll be there in a few hours. Take it easy."

"I promise," he said smiling. "Bye."

* * *

Ruth knocked on the door, not yet having her own key. Harry opened it and immediately said "Ruth?"

"Yeah," she said. "Hi." She kissed him briefly and then drew back when her nose got into gear. "Are you cooking?"

"Maybe," he said smiling. "I wanted to try and feel something other than my own incompetence," he added, closing the door behind her. "It's only pasta."

"Great," she said. She poked her head around the kitchen but was pleased that there didn't seem to be much mayhem or destruction. The pan of pasta was steaming on the cooker and a screw top bottle of wine was on the table.

"The guy promised me this was a bottle of white burgundy," Harry said. "If its not, I'll go back and kill him."

Ruth laughed, not mentioning that he'd managed to get out of the house on his own. She picked up the bottle and ran her thumb over the label. "White burgundy," she agreed. "Thank you."

Harry smiled slightly nervously at her. "Would you do me a favour and drain the pasta? I might make a mess of it."

"Of course," she said, squeezing his arm before doing it. She put it on two plates as Harry brought a salad bowl over to the table. "You made salad?"

"Yes," he said. "I nicked the top of my finger with a knife, but otherwise it was okay."

"Thank you," she said. "How long did it take you?"

"About an hour," he said with a smile. "How does it look?"

"Delicious," she said, not mentioning that the cucumber was very unevenly chopped. He'd made an effort and that was what mattered. And a man had only cooked for her maybe half a dozen times in her life. For Harry to do it, when it was such a difficult thing for him meant the world to her.

"Harry this pasta is wonderful," she said honestly. She would have said it had it tasted like battery acid, but it was actually delicious.

"I hate to say it," Harry said. "But this isn't actually bad."

"It's great," she said. It took a very short time for the plates to empty. Harry reached across and cradled her face gently. That was when he realised that her cheek was wet. She was crying.

"Ruth what's wrong?"

"Nothing," she said, letting his hand stay there. "So few men have ever bothered to cook for me. And with the fact that you're… blind, I just assumed you wouldn't because you can't. I just… feel happy that you did this for me. I don't mean to cry."

"It was only pasta," he said quietly. "It doesn't deserve tears."

"Oh I know," she said, wiping her eyes. "I'm being silly."

"You're wonderful," he said smiling. "Now, dessert was a bit beyond my capabilities, but there should be some ice cream in the freezer."

"I rather thought we could go upstairs for dessert," she said, her voice low. "If you want to?"

"How can I refuse that tempting offer?" he asked, his voice low.

"Well, we haven't broken in your shower yet," Ruth suggested with a smile.

"How true." Ruth moved across and perched on his lap, kissing him slowly. "Mm, shower?"

"Yes," she said, laughing.

* * *

**Sorry for the delay, I've been ill. Hope you liked this chapter.**


	9. Chapter 9

Harry lay stroking her hair gently. "It curls when its wet," he said quietly, his fingers going through the strands.

"Yeah," she agreed. "It always straightens out when it dries though."

"I like your hair," he said.

"Thanks," she said. "Hey, what's this envelope?" she asked, picking up the brown packet and giving it over to him.

"Oh. That's the Braille envelope. I haven't opened it yet."

"Sorry," she said. "I didn't mean to… It doesn't matter."

"You can read it if you want," he said. "It's not like I can anyway."

"Okay," she said. She tipped the envelope out and started sorting out the papers. Harry was right, it was a beginners introduction to Braille. As she was looking through it Harry kept stroking her naked back, which made it hard to concentrate. "You could learn you know. Braille."

"I don't want to," he said.

"You're stubborn," she said, shaking her head with amusement.

"I did learn a while back," he said. "When I was a boy scout, spent an afternoon looking at it. None of it really sunk in though. I never thought I'd need it." He sighed and shrugged his shoulders. "Can you read more Jane Eyre to me please?"

"Yeah," she said. "Of course I will." She picked up the book and turned to last nights page and began to read.

"I like you reading to me," he said quietly.

"Be quiet," she said, smiling at him.

* * *

The week rolled by quietly. Ruth tried to get home on time every night and Harry always seemed pleased to see her, so to speak. On Friday night Ruth realised she hadn't been home all week. And she hadn't missed it in the slightest. Her house would be covered in dust when she eventually got home.

They were curled up on the sofa together, not really watching or listening to it, just existing together. "Ruth, I meant to ask you something," he said. "Are we… using any birth control?"

"Ah," she said. "No, I'm not using anything," she said, biting her lip. "I need to explain something to you."

"I'm listening," he said, voice level.

"Well, about fifteen years ago, I met this man," she said. "I was head over heels in love with him. Anyway… We were engaged, and we wanted to try for a baby. Nothing happened. After about a year we went to have some tests." She sighed heavily and paused.

"You don't have to tell me," he said quietly.

"No," she said. "It's only fair that you know. It turned out that I was unlikely to conceive naturally. I only have a five percent chance that I will ever get pregnant. Well, Stephen, he didn't want to hang around for me when I might be barren. He left me, breaking my heart in the process."

"I'm sorry."

Ruth squeezed his hand gently. "I always wanted children. It was a major blow to know I probably couldn't have one. So, ever since I've never used any protection. It's stupid and irresponsible, but I just thought that I should increase the odds. No matter how inconvenient it would have been at the time, it would be better than never having a baby at all." She shrugged uncomfortably. "I don't mean to sound like a slut or anything," she said. "There's only been two men since. Well, three with you. I hoped that one day I would be pregnant, but I'm now forty and nothing's ever happened." She paused. "I'm sorry, it's not fair to you. Look, I'll go on the pill."

"No," he said. "Do what you want."

"Do you mean that?" she asked surprised.

"Ruth, I've spent eight years wanting you," he said quietly. "Whatever this is between us, its not a temporary or quick thing. This is more. Am I wrong?"

"No, you're not," she said. "But I should have spoken to you."

"Yes," he said easily. "You should have. But if you do get pregnant, I would love to raise our baby together. In spite of the fact I might be useless."

"You are an amazing man," she said quietly.

"Well, I didn't exactly think of birth control either," he said. "I never asked." He sighed. "You'd be a good mum."

"You think so?" she asked.

"Yeah," he said. "You're caring and I know you'd be wonderful with a child." She sighed sadly. "And I have to admit something to you too."

"What?"

"I've been put on the transplant list," he said. Ruth looked at him. "New corneas. So there is hope."

"I thought you had to be injured for at least six months before getting on that list?" Ruth asked.

"So you've looked into it?" Harry asked happily.

"Yes," she admitted. "I didn't want to give up on you. It won't restore it perfectly, but it'll help."

"Yes," Harry said. "Apparently losing your eyesight for Queen and country is a good method for skipping the waiting list."

"Dare I guess one word?" Ruth said. "Malcolm?"

"Yes," Harry said, smiling. "He'd heard and wanted to know if he could help. So I asked if he could… push me on the list. Which I do feel slightly guilty about because everyone on that list needs corneas."

"You're only cutting the six month queue before going on the actual list," Ruth said. "Plus you've got to get some benefit from protecting the country from bombers and terrorists for the last thirty years."

He nodded in agreement. "It might take up to a year," he admitted. "And there's no guarantee it'll work either."

"No I know," she said. "But I won't give up on you." She kissed him gently.

"I love you," he said. Ruth smiled. She reached for his wrists and put his hands on her face so he could feel her smile. Then she leaned in and kissed him.

"I love you too."

* * *

Harry awoke with a jerk. He must have made a noise because Ruth stirred, resting a hand on his chest. "What is it?" she said sleepily.

"I had a dream," he said quietly.

"Nightmare?"

"No," he said. "Not a nightmare at all. It was beautiful."

"What was it about?" she asked, leaning up on her shoulder to watch him.

"It was summer. You were sitting in the middle of a beautiful green meadow, the grass so long. You were wearing a blue sun dress and there were poppies all around you. Your hair was longer than it is now. Down to the tops of your breasts and it was blowing slightly in the breeze. You saw me and your face broke out into a wide smile. Like I was all you needed to be happy. I came over to you and then I saw our baby boy, sleeping on your stomach. He looked gorgeous. Maybe eight months old, blonde wispy hair. He had these blue dungarees on and he looked like a right little tyke. While he slept he sucked his thumb, and you had your hand on his head, like you were keeping him safe. I leaned over and kissed you before sitting either side of him. I don't know his name, but he looked happy. There was a punnet of strawberries in the picnic basket and you gave me one. I licked your fingers. And then I woke up."

She could see the tears rolling down his face and she felt so sad for him. "I'm sorry," she said.

"None of its your fault," he said. "My eyesight isn't your fault."

"Maybe not," she said. "But if I can never give you a child…"

"That wouldn't be your fault either," he said firmly. "I know it hurts you, but it isn't your fault. I hate to say it, but its just the way you were made."

"Yeah, that doesn't help," she said firmly. Harry kissed her quickly.

"I know," he said. "It was only a dream."

"Mm," she said. "Only a dream." He grasped her hand tightly, knowing how sad this made her and kept hold of her until they both fell asleep.

* * *

**I'm going to skip ahead a bit in time next. Thank you for the reviews so far. More soon!**


	10. Chapter 10

The weeks rolled past, settling into a routine. Harry wasn't happy, but he was coping surprisingly well. He'd bought several novels on CD, so Ruth didn't have to read to him all the time, and he had begrudgingly started to learn Braille. It wasn't as hard as he'd thought. He'd taken for going out for walks when it rained. He liked feeling the raindrops on his face more than he'd ever thought he would do. He had managed to occupy his time, but it became hard when she'd worked long hours. He wanted to be there in the thick of it. That or have her at home with him. Occasionally he would get a call from the grid about an old case or terror suspect that was relevant again, and he loved those calls. It was good to feel useful again.

Ruth's house had become practically obsolete, but neither of them mentioned selling it. She privately thought it was funny how more and more of her possessions kept appearing at his house day after day.

Ruth was cooking on Saturday afternoon when the doorbell rang. Harry turned the radio off and then opened it. "Hello?" There was silence and Harry felt irritation fill him at his lack of sight. "Who is it?"

"God dad, do you not even recognise your own daughter?"

"Catherine," he said with relief. He could recognise her irritated tone of voice from halfway across London. "Come in." He walked up the hall, back into the kitchen, hearing Catherine follow him. Ruth turned as they both arrived.

"Oh, hi," she said quietly. "You must be Catherine. Sit down."

"Hi," Catherine said.

"This is Ruth," Harry said.

"Have I come at a bad time?" Catherine asked, her eyes flicking from her father to the newly introduced Ruth.

"No she hasn't has she Harry?" Ruth said, her voice ice cold. The silence in the room became very uncomfortable. "You haven't told her have you?" Ruth asked in disbelief.

"No," Harry said, turning his face to the table in embarrassment.

"Well, I'm going to leave you to it," Ruth said, taking the curry off of the cooker. "Nice to meet you Catherine." Ruth left, closing the kitchen door with a snap.

"Dad what's going on?" Catherine asked.

"Well I haven't told you something," Harry said, still with his head down. "I was on an operation about six weeks ago. I got in the way of an arms dealer when he realised he'd been caught. He threw some untested chemical in my eyes and… he blinded me," Harry said succinctly.

"What?" Catherine asked, her voice hushed. "You're… blind?"

"Yes."

"No, you can't be," she said firmly. "You just can't be."

"I know. I keep telling myself that," he said, looking at where he hoped her face was. Catherine felt her heart drop as she realised he was slightly off.

"God dad! Didn't that deserve a phone call?!" she shouted. "You become disabled and you couldn't pick up the phone to call me? Come on dad!" He grasped for Catherine's hand and held it tightly.

"Cate, I feel so useless. How was I supposed to call you and tell you that I've become blind? That I used to run MI5 and now I can't even see? I'm so helpless Catey."

"Dad," she said, her voice soft as her fingers grasped her fathers hand tightly. "I deserved to know."

"I know," he said. "I hoped… with time I might get some of my sight back. I hoped that when I told you it'd all be on its way to getting back to normal. Which is a stupid hope when its permanent, but I wanted more. Not this… blackness and darkness and… blindness."

"I'm sorry," she said quietly. "Oh dad…"

"Yeah," he said with a shrug. "Oh well. How are you?" he asked, wanting to change the subject. His daughter could tell.

"Well, I had something to tell you," Catherine said, sounding happy. "Give me your hand." Harry did and Catherine put it against the curve of her stomach. A rather pronounced curve.

"You're pregnant!"

"Yes," Catherine said with a smile. "I did wonder why you didn't recognise me on your doorstep, I'm not that fat!"

"Oh my God! My darling girl!" Harry kissed her cheek and held her for a moment. "How far along are you?"

"Four months."

"Four months! You couldn't call me and tell me I was going to be a grandfather!"

"You neglected to mention the fact you're blind for six weeks," Catherine countered quickly.

Harry glowered at her. "Who got you into this mess?" he demanded.

"I suppose that's your less than subtle way of asking me who the father is?" Catherine asked.

"Well, yes," Harry said. "Who is it?"

"A man called Matthew," she said. "No, I'm not married and I'm not planning to get married in the near future."

"But Cate, a baby should be born in wedlock." Harry wasn't demanding, simply asking which is why Catherine didn't get mad.

"Dad, I know you have traditional values and I love that about you," she said. "But really, if I hadn't have come along at an inconvenient time would you ever have married mum?"

"Probably not," he admitted after a moment, ashamed.

"Look, I love you and I love mum, but none of us can ever say it was a marriage that worked."

"No," he agreed. "It wasn't."

"I'm not going to marry him because I'm pregnant dad." She squeezed his hand. "He's a nice man. If I want to in a couple of years, you can give me away. Walk me up the aisle. If he asks me of course."

"You always were wiser than your years," Harry said. "I'm going to be a grandpa!"

"Yes," she said. "It's a boy."

"Really?"

"Yeah," Catherine said. "So, who's Ruth?" she asked after silence filled the room. "The pretty woman who can cook a good curry from the smell."

"She's my… better half," Harry said. "I've been with her maybe three months. A bit less. But I've known her for eight years. She's beautiful and intelligent. She's wonderful."

"Good," Catherine said. "I'm glad you're happy. I shouldn't have blamed you for the things that went wrong dad. I was a teenager and would blame anyone but myself. You only did what you thought was right for myself and Graham. I'm not going to say you always did right by mum though."

"Well… no," he said. "I'm sorry. How is your brother?"

"Clean," Catherine said. "He's got a small flat in south London. He's… doing well. He'd like to hear from you." Harry snorted. "He would lie and shout at you, but really… deep down he'd like to know you're thinking about him."

"Maybe I will call him," he said honestly. "I don't like arguing with him. Does he know he's going to be an uncle?"

"Yes," Catherine said. "He's already bought a little teddy for the little one. I think he likes the idea of being the favourite uncle."

"This Matthew, does he treat you right?"

"You've changed," Catherine said. "I thought the first question would be what does he do for a living."

"Catherine…"

"Yes," she said. "He treats me very well. He's in his forties. Please don't make an issue of that, he makes me happy."

"I'm not going to make an issue of it," he said. He squeezed Catherine's hand again. "Do you want to meet Ruth properly?"

"I'd love to," she said.

"Can I…" Harry reached for her face and felt her smiling for a moment before it slid off of her face.

"What are you doing?"

"Seeing if you're happy," he said. "I'll go and get Ruth." Catherine nodded and watched as he left the room, his hand resting on the wall as a guidance. She watched as he fumbled the door handle, and then left. It felt hard to picture her father as a blind man. Hard for her to comprehend it. But there seemed to be no other way he wouldn't recognise his eldest child on his doorstep. Harry Pearce was blind. It was hard to imagine.

Ruth came in, holding Harry's hand, a nervous smile on her face. "Hello Catherine."

"Hi," she said, smiling at the woman who lived with her father. "Nice to meet you."

"And you," Ruth said. "Congratulations."

"Thank you," Catherine said beaming. "I'm really looking forward to it. So where did you meet dad?"

"Work," she said. "I was the mousy analyst that he ignored for two years until I started to… well, see my attractions?"

"I always recognised your potential," he said dignified.

"You held it over me for three weeks when my secondment was over," Ruth said sharply. "Threatening to send me back to GCHQ. You never were going to were you?"

"No," he said. "I liked having you under my eye. So to speak."

"So, what do you do Catherine?" Ruth asked.

"Well, instead of travelling to the middle east, I have a job editing the films. Charity programmes and the like. Its fun and enjoyable. Plus I know you like it when I'm safe in the country dad."

"I do," he said. "Seen far too much in my line of work Cate. Plus when you were in Islamabad I know for a fact there was a bomb pointing at the city. It took ten years off my life, so forgive me if I'd rather keep you safe in the UK."

"God, I never knew that!" Catherine said. "And all the time I thought you were a paranoid git."

"I am a paranoid git," he said. "I love you though." Catherine smiled at him.

"Thanks dad." Catherine hugged him again. "So Ruth, why is a beautiful woman like you settling for a man like him?"

"Excuse me?" Harry said.

"He has qualities," Ruth said. "Even though he can be a stubborn git."

"Right, I'm leaving now while you two continue to discuss me like an inanimate object," Harry said grumbling. Both women laughed at his retreating back, the ice well and truly thawed.

"Do you want a drink?" Ruth asked. "Tea or coffee?"


	11. Chapter 11

**An extra chapter today because I have a busy weekend. Enjoy.**

* * *

The weeks passed into months. Much to his surprise, Harry found himself happy. Ruth always came home at five, and they spent their evenings and weekends together in pleasant company. Ruth sold her house and they'd booked a holiday with the money. To Tenerife. Harry had insisted that the remainder be put in an account under her name. So if their relationship failed or fell apart, she'd still have money to fall back on. She'd argued but in the end given in. It was easier that way. Harry had become used to his lack of eyesight. He'd actually taken up the piano, and Ruth loved listening to it around the corner when he didn't know she was there. It had taken him a few weeks for him to make anything like a tune, but now he had it was beautiful. She was sure that when she was at work Harry spent the majority of time practising. But whatever kept him happy.

Harry was beginning to get nervous about being a grandfather. Catherine was a week late, so she could give birth any time now. Harry went from being eager to hold his grandson to terrified that something bad would happen while Catherine was giving birth.

* * *

"It's today."

"You woke me up at…er…" she looked at the clock. "Four a.m. to tell me that its today?"

"I'm going to be a grandfather today," Harry said.

"Well, until you get the phone call, I'd advise you to sleep," Ruth said. "Night."

"Sorry," he said. "I'll leave you to sleep."

"Thanks," Ruth said sleepily. She patted his arm and rolled over, asleep within a couple of minutes. Harry stayed awake, having a feeling in the pit of his stomach. He knew that it would be today. Although how he knew it he'd never be able to explain.

The phone rang at seven in the morning. "Yes?" Harry said, almost breathlessly.

"Dad? I'm in St Mary's hospital," Catherine said breathlessly. "It's started."

"Fantastic," he said. "I'll be there as soon as Ruth can drive me."

"It doesn't feel fantastic!" Catherine cursed. "You bloody fool! Look, my mum is in New York because the baby was due last week and I'd really like you to be here."

"Of course sweetheart," Harry said. "Is your mum trying to get a flight back?"

"There's no point," Catherine said. "With all the waiting lists at JFK for a flight back to London it'll take just as long. She's coming back tomorrow anyway. Ah!"

"Right sweetheart, I'll be there as soon as I can," Harry said. "Don't worry, it'll all be okay."

"That's fucking unhelpful!" Catherine almost spat down the phone. Ruth took the phone from him.

"Hi Catherine, I'll get your father to the hospital in one piece."

"Thanks Ruth. I hate all men at the moment."

"I can't say I know how you feel, but you have my sympathies. Just think of your son you'll be holding in an hour or two."

"Okay," Catherine said, her breathing. "See you soon."

"Bye." Ruth looked at Harry and saw that he was both exhilarated and frightened. "It'll be all right," Ruth said, putting her arms around him. "Come on, I'll take you to the hospital."

"How can Jane book a holiday at a time like this?" Harry cursed. "Her daughters giving birth!"

"Jane is not the issue," Ruth said, feeling slightly guilty about how pleased she felt that she wouldn't bump into Harry's ex wife. "I've got the keys."

"Great," Harry said. "Oh God, I'm going to be a grandpa."

"Come on," she said calmly, holding his arm and leading him out of the house. He could normally manage on his own, but not when he was this distracted.

* * *

"Right, Catherine's in the delivery room and the midwife will come and get you when there's any news," Ruth said, sitting next to him. "Do you want me to stay?"

"What? Of course I do!" he said quickly. "You can't leave!"

"Okay," she said, covering his hand with her own. "I just thought that… as I'm not related to Catherine, she might not want me here."

"I need you," he said quietly. "In both ways. I need you to be my eyes, and I need you to be here for me. What if… anything goes wrong?"

"Women give birth everyday," Ruth reassured. "She'll be fine."

"Okay," Harry said.

"I'm just going to call work," she said. "I'll be back in a minute."

"Okay," he said, squeezing her hand tightly before she left.

* * *

The hours slowly ticked by, and Harry was becoming more agitated by the second. "This is taking too long."

"No it's not, it's fine," Ruth said. "My mum told me that I took twenty hours before I appeared."

"God, I'll be on the edge of nervous collapse if she takes that long," Harry said. Ruth kissed his cheek lightly. Suddenly a nurse came to them, a happy smile on her face.

"Mr Pearce?"

"Yes?" he asked nervously.

"You have a healthy grandson," the nurse said smiling. "Catherine wants to see you."

"Oh good," Harry said with relief. "They're both all right?"

"Perfectly so," the nurse said. "Mum's a bit tired, but they're both well. If you'd like to follow me." Ruth held onto his arm and followed the nurse down the corridor to Catherine's room. She opened the door and knew that Harry's frustration at his lack of sight was coming to the foreground. They walked in and Ruth saw a beautiful bundle in a blue blanket.

"Hi dad," Catherine said, smiling.

"Is my grandson here?" he asked.

"Yes," Catherine said smiling at him. "Sleeping." Ruth led Harry to the chair next to the bed and sat him down. Catherine reached for her fathers hand and guided it to the baby's head. Harry cupped his hand around the baby's warm skin and smiled, feeling the fine hair of his grandsons head.

"What colour is his hair?"

"Blonde," Catherine said. "Very fine and fair blonde. Blue eyes too." Harry moved his hand and touched the baby's button nose softly. The baby blinked, as if confused by this new person. "You know, he looks like those baby pictures of you dad," Catherine said. Harry smiled at his family.

"I know it's a lot to ask, but can I hold him?" Catherine looked at Ruth for a moment, worry on her face. Ruth mouthed "he'll be okay." Catherine very carefully and warily passed the baby over, Harry being very careful.

"Lift your elbow up a little," Ruth said quietly. Harry did as he was instructed and soon had the little boy safely in his arms.

"Does he have a name yet?" Harry asked, feeling the solid comforting weight in his arms.

"Ethan," she said, smiling at her son and her father.

"Where's Matthew?" Harry asked.

"Calling his parents," Catherine said. "He'll be here soon."

"I should leave," Ruth said quietly, getting the feeling that she was intruding on a private family gathering.

"No," Catherine said. She looked between Harry and Ruth and Ruth could read on her face what she was thinking. _Harry needs you here._ "Stay."

"He's beautiful," Ruth said.

"Yes," Catherine said closing her eyes in exhaustion. Ruth watched as Harry held his grandson and she felt an ache deep inside her. She'd never have this. Never be able to watch as Harry held their child. Never know the joys of motherhood and watching their child grow. It hurt indescribably. But on the other hand, watching Harry holding his grandson had a lot of happiness for them. And she knew, that at this moment in time he'd give his right arm for just an hour with working eyes.

* * *

That night in bed Harry was tossing and turning and couldn't sleep. "Why don't you talk about it?" Ruth said quietly.

He sighed and sat up. "I'm never going to see my grandson. I can't… I can't picture him, I'll never see him. It's heartbreaking."

"I know," she said quietly.

"I never thought there would be something or someone I wanted to see more than you," he admitted. "But there is. Because you, I remember what you look like. You're imprinted on my memory. But Ethan… he's brand new. I can't picture him in my mind."

"I know," she said quietly. "You have to have hope though. That this cornea transplant will help you."

"It's been months," he said dimly.

"Which means you'll be moving up the list," she said.

"And even if I get them… there's no guarantee it'll help."

"It will," she said firmly. "I believe it will."

He sighed. "I'll cheer up in the morning," he said. "Just… it makes me sad."

"I know," Ruth said. She stroked his face gently as the tears came. Neither of them spoke, words weren't needed between them. She simply held him until his tears burnt out. Eventually he slept and she looked at him.

"Oh Harry," she said sadly, shaking her head. "I do love you, you know? You stupid, stubborn, wonderful man." She kissed his temple and settled back into bed, pulling the duvet around them.


	12. Chapter 12

**I hope the Graham bit doesn't feel to rushed, I don't enjoy writing him very much. Anyway, thanks for the reviews, and I hope this chapter meets expectations.**

* * *

Harry pressed speed dial and waited for the phone to connect, Ruth sitting opposite him as he tapped his fingers on the kitchen table. "Yeah?"

"Catherine, how are you?"

"Trying to settle in at home with a crying baby," she said tiredly. "I'm fine."

"I wondered if you had a number for your brother," Harry said quickly before he lost his nerve.

"You haven't called him yet?" Catherine said exasperated.

"No," Harry said. "I needed to… well, shelve my pride and get ready to be yelled at before calling him. Can you give me his number please?"

"Yeah, hang on," she said. Catherine reeled off the number and Harry spoke it to Ruth who wrote it down.

"Thanks Catherine," he said. "Kiss my grandson for me."

"I will," she said. "Stop before you get to bloodshed."

"Yeah," he said, feeling nervous already. "Bye." He put the phone down and looked at Ruth.

"He'll be all right," she said. "He's your son. He might be angry, but he loves you." She squeezed his hand. Harry nodded and handed her the phone so she could dial in the number. He felt very grateful to Ruth for not pushing him over the past few months to get into contact with his son. She knew not to push him, and he loved her for that. Then she gave the phone to him and waited. "Do you want me to leave?"

"No," he said firmly, holding her hand.

"Pearce."

"Hi, Graham," Harry said slowly. "It's… Harry."

"Oh. Hi," he said, his voice a mask, not showing any emotion at all. "What do you want?"

"I want to see how you are," Harry said. "Make sure you're okay."

"I'm fine," he said harshly. The words _no thanks to you_ were hanging in the air between them. "What do you want?"

"To say I'm sorry," he said, his breath coming out in a rush. "I am sorry Graham."

"For what?"

"For being a poor father," he said. "For not realising that I was happy with the son I have rather than what I thought you should be. I am sorry."

"Dad, it doesn't go away just because you've apologised," Graham said.

"No, I know," he said. "But that apology has been a long time coming. How are you?"

"I'm good," he said quietly. "I'm working for a landscapers. It's good. Good money too. I'm clean," he added after a pause.

"That's great," Harry said. "I always wanted you to be well and happy."

"Dad… I can't do this now…" he said.

"Have you met your nephew yet?" Harry asked to try and change the subject.

"Yeah," he said, a smile in his voice now. "He's great. So small though."

"Graham, I'm always here if you need me."

"Thanks," he said after a moments hesitation. "Did you… did Cate tell you about my eyes?"

"Yeah, she mentioned it," Graham said. "Is it true?"

"Yes," Harry said his voice low.

"Well, I'm sorry," he said, not really sounding it. "Dad I have to get back to work."

"Well, its good to talk to you," Harry said. "Bye son."

"Bye." Harry put down the phone and let out his breath in a sigh.

"I didn't hear screaming," Ruth said quietly.

"No," he agreed. "He didn't even seem mad or angry. More… resigned."

"That means there's hope," Ruth said quietly. "For one day, you and he to see eye to eye." He raised his eyebrows at her. "You know what I mean."

"I do. Come here," he said, his voice husky. She did, sitting on his lap, her arms around his neck. He kissed her softly and sweetly. "I love you," he said, before leaning in and kissing her more thoroughly.

"I'm rather fond of you too," she said, kissing him. Their embrace went on and on, neither pausing for breath. That was until Ruth felt his erection under her thigh. "Mm," she said. "Want to go upstairs?"

"Not particularly," he said, his thumbs playing with the hem of her blouse. "I seem to remember my kitchen table is more than adequate for a flat surface. With the added bonus of the fact that we've never had sex here."

"No we haven't," she said smiling. She reached down held his penis tightly through the fabric of his trousers and he groaned. He pulled her close, his hands on her bum and moaned.

"The one time I want you to wear one of those long skirts so I could pull it out of the way, and you decide to wear jeans," he said, shaking his head.

"I didn't get dressed with sex on the kitchen table in mind," she whispered into his ear. Guiding his hands to the button on the front of her jeans, Ruth waited until he took the initiative. Which took maybe two seconds and she laughed happily.

* * *

Jo yawned as her desk phone rang. No one had told her before she joined the security services about the amount of paperwork involved. She hadn't been undercover on the most minor operation in two weeks now. "Yeah?" she asked, picking up the phone.

"Jo, is Ruth in the office?" Harry asked quickly.

"Er, no," Jo said after a cursory look around the grid. "She's picking up one of Malcolm's old drops. You should know that, she does it every month on the sixth."

"I know, I was just checking," Harry said. "I need your help and I don't want Ruth to find out about this."

"Fine," Jo said, curiosity burning in her.

"No matter what, I want no one knowing this," Harry said. "You cannot tell a soul, which is why I'm trusting you. You need to employ all of your spook training."

"I'm listening."

"I need to go and buy an engagement ring," Harry said.

"Wow," Jo said quietly, checking that no one was listening. "Congratulations. Why are you telling me?"

"I'm not brilliant on jewellery anyway," Harry said. "I want to buy something that she really loves, not just something she tell me she likes and really hates. Plus, with me being blind I don't know what everything looks like and I must be a target to be sold some rubbish from jewellers when they realise I can't tell what they're selling. I need a pair of eyes. Please don't tell her."

"Oh I'm not going to tell her," Jo said, smiling. "I'd love to help. What about Wednesday?"

"That sounds perfect," Harry said firmly. "What's your cover story?"

"I've taken the day off anyway. My old school friend has a party back at home and I've been looking for an excuse not to go to it for ages. I'm not expected on the grid, so that would suit me perfectly."

"Are you sure?" Harry asked. "I don't want you to miss out."

"Oh please," Jo said. "It's a spa day with cackling women. I'd rather help you."

"Thank you," he said relieved. "Just… well, thank you."

"No problem," Jo said. "See you Wednesday. I'll come round at what? Half nine?"

"Yeah, Ruth'll be at work then," Harry said. "Thanks Jo." Jo smiled as she put the phone down. So Harry was going to propose was he? And if she could read the look of happiness on Ruth's face whenever Harry came up in conversation… Ruth would say yes. Jo smiled to herself, the knowledge burning deep inside her.


	13. Chapter 13

**This is the last of what I've got written. Need to get typing!**

* * *

"So what kind of ring are you looking for?" Jo asked as they walked into the jewellers.

"Something nice," Harry said. "Delicate and pretty. You know Ruth. Something ostentatious doesn't seem like her."

"What can I help you two with today?" the balding jeweller asked, smiling at them both.

"We're after an engagement ring," Harry said.

"Okay," he said. He lead them over to the cabinet with maybe a hundred different rings in it.

"Wow," Jo said in a whisper.

"Anything in particular we're looking for, for the lucky lady?"

"Unfortunately I'm blind, so I've got my friend helping me. It might take a while."

"Oh, of course," he said, covering up his surprise. "When you need to have a closer look at one, I'll unlock it for you. Take your time."

"Thank you," Jo said. "Wow there's so many. And what could make an engagement ring cost a hundred thousand pounds?"

"Money doesn't matter," Harry said firmly.

"It does," Jo said. Then she interrupted before Harry could argue. "It does because Ruth wouldn't want you spending a fortune on a piece of jewellery. And you know that's true."

"Well… maybe," he said. "I thought maybe something in white gold. A diamond or a cluster of diamonds on top. I want it pretty, and I want her to want to wear it."

"The fact that you're giving it to her will make her want to wear it," Jo said honestly. "Does it have to be diamonds or would she like a different gemstone?"

"No I think diamonds," Harry said. "Unless you see something you think she'd like."

They were quiet as Jo had a look at all the rings. "I like that one," she said eventually. "It's platinum and it has a diamond and two sapphires on either side. I think she'll like that."

"This is pointless," Harry said. "How am I supposed to know what she'd like?"

"Go for the sapphire one," she said. "The ring won't matter. She loves you."

"Has she told you that?"

"She doesn't have to," Jo said. She patted his shoulder gently. "Can we have a look at ring AX42 please?"

"Jo, thanks," Harry said firmly.

"You're welcome."

* * *

Ruth finished her spaghetti carbonara, a big smile on her face. "You know I can't eat in this kitchen without thinking about our escapades on this table."

"Well, I like to make things memorable," he said with a grin. "Did you enjoy that?"

"The meal was delicious," she said. "I don't think I have room for dessert."

"Well…" he reached across the table and grasped her hand quietly. "You know how much I love you."

"I know," she said, a frown on her face. "I don't forget that Harry. I can't."

"I've been in love with you for as long as I can remember. I know I need more help than either of us would like but..." He took a deep breath and let go of her hand so he could find the ring in his jacket pocket. He got it out, fumbled with the opening of the box and then showed it to her. "Ruth, will you marry me?"

"Oh my God…" she breathed, her eyes flicking from between Harry's face to the ring presented to her. "Yes," she said quickly, when she saw the nervousness settling on his face. "Yes. I'll marry you." She laughed with happiness and squeezed his hand before he slipped the ring onto her finger.

"Really?"

"Yes," she said. "Oh Harry…" She leaned across and kissed him passionately, feeling the new ring cool on her finger. She felt so happy that she didn't even notice how Harry got her pinned up against the kitchen wall, kissing her for all she was worth, making her feeling like she was melting.

"Harry… oh God," she breathed, his tongue going over the tops of her breasts before he ripped her blouse apart. Suddenly the phone rang. "Ignore it, she said breathlessly. He was more than happy to oblige. Harry's hand had dipped beneath her skirt and his fingers stroking her when the answer phone clicked in.

"Mr Pearce, this is Doctor Turner. I really need you to call as soon as possible. We have a donor available and…"

"Let me go!" Ruth breathed as the message started to invade her brain. "Stop stop stop! Let me go!" Harry did, bewildered. He hadn't heard the message but she had so she rushed to the phone. "Hello? Yes," she said breathlessly.

"Absolutely. Of course. Yep. We can be there in an hour."

"Be where?" Harry asked, disappointed that his engagement night seemed to have been thrown off course. He'd been looking forward to having Ruth up against the wall. Quite literally _having_ her.

"Of course," Ruth said, ignoring Harry. "Absolutely. Thank you so much. Goodbye." Ruth turned to Harry, ignoring for the moment the fact that her breasts were spilling out of her bra.

"Harry, they've got corneas for you."

* * *

**Hope you enjoyed! More on Monday hopefully.**


	14. Chapter 14

Harry wasn't as pleased as he might be. He'd been dragged to the hospital on an evening where all he wanted to do was make love to his beautiful and eager fiancé. The fact he'd been poked and prodded with all sorts of tests and medical cross matches hadn't improved his temper.

"Harry, cheer up," Ruth said flicking through her magazine.

"Are we alone?"

"Yes," she said, knowing that the doctors were picking up the donors corneas at this moment rather than worrying about him.

"I'm meant to be making love to my new fiancé," he grumbled. "Not lying in an uncomfortable hospital bed undergoing tests."

"This is to help you," she said firmly. "And the cross match came back negative, which means you're a perfect fit with the donor. According to the doctor anyway, I haven't the faintest idea what all that means. This is so you can hopefully get your eyesight back. I can wait," she added, her voice sultry.

"Mm," he said.

The door opened and an impossibly young and pretty blonde doctor walked in.

"Mr Pearce, I have a consent form for you to sign."

"So the surgery's going ahead?" Ruth asked.

"Yes," the doctor said. "We're going to wheel him up to the operating room in a few minutes."

"It is safe… isn't it?" Ruth asked. Harry smiled at her nervousness. It felt nice to know she cared.

"Yes," the doctor said. "Very low risk surgery, and of course it won't make his eyesight worse."

"Impossible," Harry said. "It can't get worse." Ruth passed him the clipboard and guided him to the signature line. He put his signature and then the doctor took the clipboard back.

"Thank you. We'll be with you momentarily."

"Great," he said. When they were alone Ruth leaned over him and kissed him gently. "What's that for?"

"Well, no matter what's happening right now, tonight is the night we got engaged." He could hear the happiness in her voice. "So I'm going to enjoy it for the few minutes I've got until you get wheeled off and put under anaesthetic. Okay?"

"Fine," he said, wrapping his arms around her tightly. He didn't want to let go.

* * *

"How did he do?" Ruth asked as a doctor came to see her.

"All signs point to it being a successful surgery," the doctor said. "We won't know more until he wakes up. About the state of his sight."

"Okay," Ruth said. "Can I see him?"

"Yes, follow me," the doctor said. Ruth did, feeling her eyes itch with tiredness from the early hours of the morning.

"How long until he wakes up?"

"Probably a few hours," the doctor said. "Don't worry, he did well."

"Good," Ruth said fervently. She went through the hospital door and saw Harry lying in bed, his even breathing filling the room. "Can I stay with him?"

"Of course," she said. "I'll leave you alone."

"Thank you," she replied, sitting in a chair next to his bed. She grasped his hand tightly, feeling his warm skin beneath her fingers. He was reassuringly present and sleeping. She waited for him to awake, her eyes going to his every few moments, trying to see or sense a change. But eventually she gave in. Tiredness crowded her and she let go of consciousness, her head on Harry's bed, her hand tight on his as she slept.

* * *

Harry felt very groggy as he slowly returned to wakefulness. The memories of the last twenty four hours started sinking back in to his consciousness. Ruth agreeing to marry him, then the phone call from the hospital. New eyes, he remembered with a start. But he was still in darkness. Blackness. It took a few moments but he realised that his eyes were still closed. He didn't hurry to open them, because if it hadn't worked, his last chance at sight was gone. He'd live in ignorant bliss for a few more minutes. Until he was ready to face the rest of his life. Either way his luck turned.

He could feel a small warm hand on his own. He knew it was Ruth's. He'd have to lose a lot more than his sight not to recognise her grip. He listened in the quiet and could hear her even breathing. Slow and gentle. She must be sleeping. Maybe that was easier. He didn't want to disappoint her if he couldn't manage to see. He took a breath and opened his eyes.

A white mist seemed to be the only thing he could see. A mass of blurry grey and white. He sighed with disappointment. Was seeing permanent white better than permanent darkness? Not enough to matter. He kept staring at the mist and after about two minutes he could see a splodge of black. He focused on the mark and then realised what he was seeing. It wasn't a mist of white, he was staring at the ceiling of his hospital room. He dragged his eyes down to the bed and saw Ruth. He _saw_ Ruth. Her dark hair fanned out around her. She was slightly blurry around the edges, but it was her. He could see. He couldn't help it. He felt so overwhelmed that he started crying. He tried to be quiet, but Ruth heard him. She sat up and looked at him blearily, wiping the sleep from her eyes.

"Harry? What is it? What's wrong?" Her brow creased in confusion and then understanding dawned in her. "Oh it doesn't matter," she said swallowing the lump in her throat. "It really doesn't matter. Your… your sight. I'm sorry for you, but it doesn't matter. You'll be okay. We'll be fine. We'll have a good long and happy life together, no matter what."

"No Ruth," he said, wiping his tears away. "It's not that."

"Well, what is it then?" she asked, her voice soft. She let her hand cradle his face gently, her thumb going across the stubble on his cheek.

"It's…" he swallowed. "I can see you."

"What?" she asked, her voice a quiet hush. "You can… see? Really?"

"I can," he said. "You're beautiful." She smiled at him, the silence between them filled with things that didn't need to be said. Love, trust and happiness in the air of the room. He reached for her and let his fingers tangle in her hair. Soft as a whisper. "You're so beautiful."

"I'm going to go," she said, wiping the dampness from her eyes. "I need to call Catherine and ask her to bring Ethan to see you."

"Yes," he said. "But wait a few minutes. I want to appreciate you first." His index finger slowly traced the contours of her face. He'd done this a hundred times but never before had his eyes followed the path of his fingers. Ruth felt a bubble of powerful emotion rising inside her at the intensity of his gaze and she had to look away from him.

"What is it?" he asked quietly, his hand reluctantly dropping from her face.

"The way you're looking at me…" she said. "I mean, I must look a fright. I've barely slept, I have no make up on at all and I haven't dragged a brush through my hair in twenty four hours."

"I haven't been able to see you for nearly a year," he said quietly, her eyes returning to his. "You look… beautiful. Even though I know I'm repeating myself, no other word suits you."

She smiled and then leaned in, kissing him gently. She didn't want to stop, and judging by Harry's hand on her back, pulling her close. All she could do was smile.

* * *

**Okay, so his recovery has happened much quicker here than it would have in real life, but I hope no one minds. Thank you for the reviews so far, and it would be great if you could leave another. Thank you.**


	15. Chapter 15

Catherine, with Ethan in her arms opened the hospital door warily. Ruth had said that her father had his sight back, but she was still nervous. Harry had his eyes closed and Ruth wasn't there. Maybe getting something to eat, she'd been here all night after all. Or maybe she was using tact and leaving him alone with his family. It seemed like something Ruth would do.

Catherine closed the door with a click and Harry's eyes opened at the sound. "Cate!" he said, sitting up.

"You can see me?" she asked quietly.

"I can," Harry said, a wide grin on his face. "Even better, I can see that baby in your arms." Catherine smiled. "Well bring him over then!" Harry said impatiently, a grin on his face like an overgrown school boy. Catherine did and passed the baby over, Harry being totally silent as he held his grandson.

"Oh," he said quietly. The baby's eyes were open and he was staring at his grandfather. "Oh, you are precious," Harry said. His face broke out into a truly happy giddy grin. "He's so gorgeous Cate."

"I know," she said. "But I'm biased."

Silence filled the room as Harry continued to admire his grandchild. Eventually Catherine noticed the tears in his eyes. "You're crying."

"Yes, well," he said, trying to sniff his tears away. "He's perfect." Ethan yawned and Harry smiled again at him.

"Where's Ruth?" Catherine asked. Anything to break the silence.

"I don't know," Harry said. "I think she's tactfully leaving us alone."

"I thought as much," she said with a smile. "How is she?"

"I've asked Ruth to marry me," he said quietly.

"Oh?"

"She makes me happy," Harry said. "And through some miracle, I make her happy too."

"Good," she said. "I'm… glad."

"Really?"

"I'm glad you're happy," she said. "And I like Ruth. She's calm and quiet. She's good for you."

"A balm for my quick and fiery temper?" Harry asked quickly.

"Well, something like that," she said. "She's nothing like I'd pictured your second wife."

"No," Harry agreed. Ruth wasn't historically the type of woman he went for, so he couldn't blame Catherine's thinking. But he knew that Ruth was the woman he needed. "You're not going to get the Pearce temper are you?" he said to the baby, rocking him gently. "You're going to be a good boy."

"I doubt it," Catherine said. "Pearce men are stubborn and hot blooded with quick tempers. I highly doubt he'll break the mould."

"Ah well," Harry said to the baby. "Just try to be good. Don't give your mother nightmares."

"He already does," Catherine admitted. Harry frowned at her. "I wake up in the middle of the night convinced he's died. I stand over his cot just to hear him breathe. I'm scared I'll lose him dad."

"Sweetheart, that is being a parent," Harry said calmly. "And I'm sorry to say, it never goes away Cate. No matter how old your child or children get you always worry about them. It just means that you're a mother."

Catherine smiled at both her father and her son, as the younger of them started fussing. "Oh what's wrong?" Harry asked.

"He probably wants feeding," Catherine said. "Give him here." Reluctantly Harry handed the baby over. Catherine took him in her practised arms. "Do you mind if I… feed him here?" she asked. "I don't want to trawl through the hospital trying to find somewhere while he'll be screaming."

"It's fine," Harry said. "You can use the bathroom if you want." Catherine smiled and went into the suggested bathroom before feeding Ethan. The snuffling cries were silenced instantly. Harry closed his eyes in tiredness and fell asleep very quickly.

* * *

"Oh come on," Harry grumbled that night.

"I'm sorry Mr Pearce," the doctor said. "We would like to keep you in for observation, just overnight. If nothing significant changes than we will discharge you in the morning."

"Are you expecting a change?" Ruth asked concerned.

"No, but your husband is not a young man," the doctor said. "It's a precaution."

"Fine," he grumbled. Ruth laughed to herself at the look on his face as the door closed and they were alone. "You can go home," he said. "You don't have to stay here. There's no need for us both to be uncomfortable."

"No," she said. "I want to be with you. Budge up a bit," she added. Harry did and then felt surprise as Ruth got into bed next to him. She rested her head against his shoulder and he pulled her close. They lay as they did nearly every night, the only difference being in a hospital bed.

"Mm," she said into his skin. "I like this."

"I want to be in our king size bed at home where I can appreciate you properly," he grumbled into her hair.

"Oh I don't know," she said, her hand sneaking over his hip. "These hospital gowns have compensations." She squeezed his bum and he laughed.

"I love you," he said. She smiled back.

"Sleep." And he did.

* * *

"Go upstairs," he said, his voice low.

"Hmm?" Ruth asked taking her coat off. They'd just arrived home from the hospital and barely walked in the door.

"I'd quite like us to go upstairs," he said. "I want to be decadent and make love to you in broad daylight, where I can see every part of you. The lights on so I can see… everything." Ruth blushed at the low tone of his voice. "If you want to I mean," he added. Ruth said nothing. Instead she turned to the door and locked it. Harry grinned widely as she went upstairs. It took a few moments for him to follow her. When he did he was surprised to find the bedroom empty.

"Ruth?"

"Just slipping into something… well, less comfortable and more… sluttish I suppose."

"You don't need to do that," he said to the bathroom door.

"I've been buying fantastic underwear for months," she said. "I want you to appreciate it."

"Why did you buy it when I couldn't see it anyway?"

"Because I had faith that one day you would," she said as she opened the bathroom door. Harry's jaw dropped open. Sheer pink lace covered her breasts. Very sheer. Her nipples were hard through the fabric, a dark dusky pink. He'd touched and tasted her a hundred times, but he'd never _seen_ her naked. Now he felt his erection straining against his trousers at the image she presented. Ruth felt her face flaming at his scrutiny, but she said nothing. After all, he had a lot of time to catch up on. She did move to sit on the bed though, his eyes following her magnetically. He managed to tear his eyes away from her breasts and went slowly down her body to her hips and then to the dark hair between her legs, visible through her thin knickers.

"Look, I know you haven't seen me before but will you say something," she said, almost desperately.

"You're stunning," he whispered. "Just… so beautiful. What on earth do you want with me?"

"Well you're not bad yourself," she said. "Plus you have a delicious way of making me moan."

"Oh really?" Harry said with a raised eyebrow. She laughed as he pushed her back on the bed and covered her body with his own. He kissed her deeply and then switched both bedside lamps on.

"Harry…" she started uncomfortably.

"I want to see you," he said firmly. "Please don't be embarrassed."

"Okay," she said after a moment, knowing he needed this. Harry's fingers feathered over her skin lightly, touching her everywhere for long minutes, his eyes following his fingers. He reached behind her and removed the scrap of lace from her breasts, throwing it to the floor. He held her breasts, one in each palm. He was watching her intently, his eyes taking in every mark, freckle and curve of her body. He dipped his head and started kissing her. It almost felt like he was worshipping her and she closed her eyes in bliss.

"Ruth, you're beautiful. Ravishing." He kissed his way down her body and then pulled her knickers off quickly, kissing between her legs. "I'm going to have to make this quick," he said. "Sorry, I just... want you so badly."

"I don't mind," she said with a smile. "Get undressed though."

"Might be necessary, that," he agreed as Ruth's fingers pulled at his clothes. He quickly stripped and then he pushed two fingers inside her, curling against her most sensitive spot. "Oh Christ…" she moaned. He watched her face as he brought her right to the edge of orgasm and then removed his hand. "Bastard."

Without saying another word he pushed into her hard and she moaned. "Oh Harry…"

"I'm not going to last long," he apologised.

"Just hard and quick," she breathed, her eyes wide. "Please. Just fuck me." He did. Hard, fast and exquisitely pleasurable. He kissed her as he felt himself approaching orgasm. They both came together with cries of intense satisfaction. Harry collapsed next to her, still joined.

"I love you," he said.

"Mm," she agreed. "Love you too. Next time can we do it… slowly?"

"Yes," he said. "Give me ten minutes." She laughed happily, making him slip out of her.

Neither of them knew that the very next time they made love, they would set a course that would change their lives. Because tonight was the night that their son would be conceived.

* * *

**This is the last chapter, just an epilogue to go. Thank you for the encouraging reviews.**


	16. Epilogue

**I hadn't planned the epilogue to go this way, but enjoy anyway.**

* * *

**Epilogue.**

Ruth woke up suddenly as the door closed, Harry walking into the living room. He kissed the top of her head and she smiled wearily. "Okay?" he asked.

"Long day," she said indicating their sleeping son, his head resting on his mothers stomach. His thumb was in his mouth and his blonde eyelashes rested on his cheek like an angel. "He's an energetic little thing. I do wonder if I'm too old for a toddler."

"No you're not," he said. "I'll take James to bed."

"No, leave him there for a few more minutes," Ruth said stroking his hair. "He's comfy."

"He's a handsome little man," Harry said with pride.

"I know," she replied. Harry's vision went blurry for a moment and he closed his eyes. "All right?"

"Yeah," he said. "You know my eyes go slightly blurry when I'm tired. That's all."

"Good," she said.

"You know you look beautiful with him," Harry said. "I'm so glad I can see you again."

"You know it didn't matter to me," she said quietly. "Your lack of eyesight. Yes, it meant I ended up living with you quicker than I probably would have, and yes it meant you needed help, even when you wouldn't ask for it. But it didn't change you. Not the man you are or the man I love. It really didn't matter."

"That's because you're an amazing woman," he said. He sighed happily. "You know, we still haven't got married," he said quietly.

"Oh I know," she replied, catching sight of her engagement ring. "We haven't had the time. I didn't want to get married when I was wider than an elephant with our baby, and since then we've been busy. A child takes a lot of energy out of you."

"I know that," he said. "I just wondered if you were having second thoughts."

"No, of course I'm not," she said gently. "I'd marry you tomorrow."

"Would you?" he asked fervently.

"Well, yes," she said, thrown by his urgency in his voice.

"Good," Harry said. He delved into his jacket pocket and got out a piece of paper. "Because I've got our marriage license and I was hoping… you would marry me tomorrow." She took the paper and read it quickly.

"I don't have a dress," she said.

"Marry me naked then, I won't mind," he said. Ruth blushed at that. "Look if you want a proper big planned wedding, of course I'll organise that for you. I'd do anything for you. But I thought something small would be more to your taste."

"I don't want a big wedding," she agreed. "I would like you to look at me in my wedding dress and think I was the most beautiful woman in the world."

His face went very soft towards her. "I know that you are. And I also know you bought a beautiful blue dress for that dinner last year. With the Home Secretary and a dozen other pointless politicians which ended up being cancelled. So it's just… hanging in the wardrobe."

"You really want to marry me tomorrow don't you?" she asked, her voice hushed.

"Yes," he said. "I do. There's a nice little church I've found."

"And booked," Ruth said. She didn't need to ask, she could already tell from the way he spoke.

"And booked," he agreed.

"Lets do it then," she said easily.

"Really?" he asked, eyes wide.

"Yeah," she said. "We've been engaged for two years after all. And I always planned to marry you. So why not tomorrow?"

"I love you," he said, kissing the top of her head.

"What are we going to do with James?" Ruth asked, stroking her son's fine hair.

"Catherine's said she'll look after him."

"You have it all planned out don't you?"

"Well, I hope so," he said. "Providing you want to." Ruth got up, carefully making sure James settled on the sofa. Then she wrapped her arms around Harry's neck.

"I would love to marry you tomorrow," she said, an eager happy smile on her face. "Because I don't want to imagine my life without you."

Harry smiled happily at her and kissed her long and deep. "Can we start the honeymoon early?" he whispered against her mouth.

"Let me put James to bed, and then absolutely," she agreed. Harry laughed, watching as she carried their son upstairs. He wondered what he had done to deserve to be this happy.


End file.
